Title: LinkKiller Monkey: Link, the Master of Fire and Monkey Butlering.
What the heck?: Jane Chase, an American studying zoology at a British university, becomes a lab/life assistant for an English scientist she admires, Dr. Steven Phillip. Dr. Phillip is forced to perform his monkey studies in a large country manor on the edge of a treacherous cliff, as the university doesn't want any of his crazy apes hanging around campus. Phillip's monkey subjects include Voodoo, a violent female ape prone to rage episodes; Imp, a puckish baby chimp with a sinister secret and a pronounced butthole; and the titular Link, who is obviously an orangutan spray-painted black. Soon after Jane's arrival, Link starts to display a before unseen belligerence toward the doctor and his monkey housemates. Somehow aware that Dr. Phillip has hired someone to put him to sleep, Link murders the doctor and tosses him down a well, killing Voodoo in the process. Alone in the doctor's mansion with a homicidal ape, Jane, who is so far unaware of Link's murderous tendencies, searches for the doctor's whereabouts (Link has pushed Phillip's car off the aforementioned treacherous cliffs). Meanwhile, Imp, who can communicate through a special computer, repeatedly warns Jane that Link is dangerous. Jane realizes this all just a little too late, and when Jane's boyfriend and his two goofy classmates roll up to check in on her, Link goes completely apeshit.
What's to like: the whimsical score ratchets up the tension of each and every scene of monkey-on-man violence; Terrance Stamp as Dr. Phillip is a delight, as is a young Elizabeth Shue as Jane; the last scene before the end credits roll is cleverly sinister.
What's to not like: I feel kind of bad for the orangutan who played Link having to be painted black and smoke cigars day after day.
The truth: I'm not gonna lie, Link is going to be hard to beat. It's fun, it's got a monkey dressed as a butler, and we get to see a nubile Elizabeth Shue naked. I can't say for sure yet, but Link stands a pretty good chance of being victorious in this smackdown.Next time: King Kong - King + the letter "a" + more British people = disaster???
