Merry Christmas, everyone! The Christmas season officially dies today, but before we start making our wish lists for 2009, let's bid the holidays good night with this: the worst holiday decoration ever conceived. It's Yule Doo, the ornament that looks like dog excrement!Now, I know what you're saying: "Matt, this is a fun novelty! I gave this to one of my co-workers at the office Christmas party and got a huge laugh. Why are you being such a Scrooge?" Why, unamed person I made up? I'll tell you why! Yule Doo shits all over Christmas, which just happens to be my very favorite holiday! That's why! It isn't amusing to give someone a hunk of shit with a ribbon tied to it. It isn't funny. It is quite literally crap. Hell, if this is how little you think of someone why don't you just find a real mound of dog shit, attach a ribbon to it, and shove it in the person's face. "Here you go, asshole! I don't respect you enough to purchase you a proper present, so here's an animal's poop. Merry Christmas. I hate you."
Well, I hope all of you had as much fun as I did checking out these truly awful holiday decorations. If you have any of these decorations in your possession, please know it was all in fun. But, seriously, I'd hide them if you've invited me over to your house this year, because I will pubically ridicule you on this very blog. Try me. I guarantee you will be verbally thrashed to within an inch of your life.
Happy Holidays, folks!
