Each Friday in October, Giant Electric Penguin will bring you a selection of Horror, Horror-friendly, and Horrible music fit for listening to during this, the 31 Days of Horror.
Carman "No Monster in My House"
Only Carman would think to spoof schlocky black and white horror movies with Sunday morning worship band versions of spaghetti western and spy movie soundtracks. Pick a genre, huh? Anyway, in "No Monsters in My House," Carman recalls seeing a couple horror movies as a child (one involves a crazy murderer and the other a walking alligator) that scare the living shit out of him. He's so scared out of his little kid mind that as he lies awake in bed he experiences something we can all relate to: he's visited by demons. What!?! Demons? Really? Just because he watched a scary movie?
Well, it isn't clear where the demons come from, but it's clear that Carman thinks he was visited by real honest-to-Satan demons. So what does he do? He gets "righteously indignant" and casts them out, of course.
What's odd about this video isn't that Carman hates demons or even that Carman seems to think movie monsters are evil creatures sent by Satan to torment little kids. I remember a youth pastor a long time ago telling us young impressionable youth that the Aliens from Alien looked just like the real demons he read about in some nutcase's real-life account of visiting Hell (no, not the Bible). What's really odd about his video is that someone had a whole lot of fun recreating these supposedly demonic horror movies. Too much fun. Way too much fun. Christians shouldn't have that much fun.
But is it scary? Well, kind of. It's scary that Carman would want to equate harmless monster movie monsters with real life supernatural creatures who want to drag you to Hell. I mean, he's pretty clearly trying to give little fraidy cat kids a way to get rid of the boogiemen, but is the best way to do that convincing them that the boogiemen are real and want to hurt them? I know, I know, cast 'em out with Jesus power, but what if they get you before you can cast 'em out? What then, huh? Mr. smart guy? I hope you're planning on paying l'il Carman's psychiatrist bill when he gets older.
But the scariest part of all? When Carman winks at the end. Geez nads what a douche.
Follow the link below for 4 more Horrifying songs!
"Dracula's Lament"
"Dracula's Lament" from Forgetting Sarah Marshall pretty much sums up Dracula in a nutshell for me: He's seen a lot of pain in his long life, he hates Van Helsing for killing his bitches (bitch goddesses?), and he can't die. Poor sap. I'm glad I found this video of the Count from Sesame Street singing "Dracula's Lament" because it's awesome.
The Count "Song of the Count"
Hey, it's the same video, but different somehow.
Bonzo Dog Doo-Dah Band "Monster Mash"
This is the Bonzo Dog Doo-Dah Band's version of Bobby "Boris" Pickett's "Monster Mash" that was originally aired on the children's show Do Not Adjust Your Set, which featured pre-Python versions of Terry Jones, Michael Palin, and Eric Idle. BUT THAT DOESN'T MATTER. What matters is Bonzo Dog Doo-Dah Band performed a song called "Death Cab for Cutie" in the Beatle's Magical Mystery Tour movie. Oh, wait. THAT DOESN’T MATTER EITHER. What really matters is they had a hit in 1968 with "I'm the Urban Spaceman" which was produced (partially) by Paul McCartney. No, that doesn't matter either. I guess all that matters is ELECTRIC SPOONS!
Cramps - "Surfin' Dead"
Dan O'Bannon's 1985 film Return of the Living Dead posited a world in which zombies were created by poison gas, ate brains, and wise-cracked their way through scenes so ridiculously gory they scarred my pre-pubescent brain forever. The movie was ridiculous, just like the Cramps' "Surfin' Dead," which happens to appear on the movie's soundtrack album! In fact, Return of the Living Dead is like a movie version of the Cramps, but without the social significance.
