Are these angels from Heaven invisible? Like a guardian angel? Are you describing invisible, guardian angels? So, you have no real, visible friends? That's what I thought. I hope you and your three cats enjoy this wall decoration all the days of your lonely, stinky lives.
What if I spent the day eating Sour Cream and Onion potato chips and watching the Law and Order: Special Victims Unit marathon on USA between visits to the internet to look at porn? Are you telling me that was not a day well spent, sir? I beg to differ.
I enjoy singing, especially when people can hear me and I dance like a madman at every wedding I attend (ask the wife) simply because I'm an ego-maniac and I want people to watch me. These so-called encouragement plaques are terrible. Let's add a few more:-EAT as though you are completely unaware that there are people in this country starving but too poor to do anything about it.
-SWEAR at everyone who deserves it (i.e. everyone).
-KICK that guy who just flirted with you girlfriend in the nuts.
Accept Differences (I don't want to)Be Kind (You can only rent DVDs now anyway, so why?)
Count Your Blessings (I'll think about it)
Dream (Can't help it-we all dream every night-keeps us sane)
Express Thanks (Thank you, everyone I know, for not buying me this stupid Alphabet for Life Plaque)
Forgive (I will never forgive you for this, Skymall)
Give Freely (How about 'get freely?')
Harm No One (Why have kids then?)
Imagine More (More beneficial ways to spend my money? OK. First, do not buy hippy, feel-good encouragement plaques from the Skymall catalogue...)
Jettison Anger (Whatevs)
Keep Confidences (You mean, like, secrets? No way!)
Love Truly (I would truly love to rip this plaque into bits and set it ablaze)
Master Something (How about baiting? I'm sorry.)
Nuture Hope (Get back to me when W's out of office)
Open Your Mind (And let the Devil in? No way, buddy!)
Pack Lightly (That's the first good advice this poster has given--most airlines are charging you for extra bags now)
Quell Rumors (Well, where is the fun in that?)
Reciprocate (Reach-around?)
Seek Wisdom (Watch TV?)
Touch Hearts (Ew--they're all slimy)
Understand (I don't)
Value Truth ([enter your own snarky comment here])
Win Graciously (No deal! I always lose when I play the wife at Upwards, so when I win I get down!)
Xeriscape (huh?)*
Yearn for Peace (Stupid hippy)
Zealously Support a Worthy Cause (Is poking fun at Skymall worthy enough, for that is my cause)
*xeriscaping: environmental design of residential and park land using various methods for minimizing the need for water use.
