Say good-bye to Louross, kids. I knew calling him this year's winner was a longshot, but I had faith in the little guy. I've always been a fan of little things--runts of the litter, Ramiele Malubay, the Keebler elves--so I aimed high. At the time I wasn't aware Louross was incapable of cooking a steak properly. That was my bad. You made me look like a fool, Louross. Thanks a lot!Matt (fat reality show contestant, not fat blog artiste) doesn't need anybody to make him look like a fool, he does a damn fine job of doing that himself. How he made it to the Top Six I may never figure out, though it may be safe to say that Matty is Ramsay's favorite punching bag in the history of the program. And there's nothing America loves more than watching a sloppy, rubber-faced fat guy don a skintight wetsuit and take a surfing lesson. Anybody agree that the only reason the red team won the Cooking Relay Race Challenge was so Ramsay could see Corey and Christina in bikinis?
Also, I mentioned to my wife last night that none of the contestants are cool this season, you know, like, hip or whatever. Last year's Black Gordon Ramsey, Rock, was edgy and slightly nuts (plus, his name is Rock--C'MON!). Bobby can't even come close to that level of hipness (also, Bobby always looks like he's going to fall asleep during interviews). Rock's competition, Bonnie, was blond, prissy, and cute, but not annoying, a factor that sets her apart from former-enemies/dual-leaders of the red team, Christina and Corey. Plus, remember the tattooed guy? Tattoos! This seasons contestants are catty, sloppy, untalented, or Matt--where's the cool? Sigh.
