2011 marks the 20th anniversary of Nirvana's Nevermind, an album that changed my and I'm sure countless other's lives. In celebration, Spin magazine released a free downloadable tribute to this seminal record, titled Newermind. As a service to GEP readers and Nirvana fans alike, I have accepted the task of downloading, listening to, and assigning each track a letter grade. You're welcome.1. "Smells Like Teen Spirit" (The Meat Puppets) -- D
Can we all finally agree that it is just not a good idea to cover this song? Every attempt so far has sucked super hard and the Meat Puppets take is no better. In preparation for recording this sub par "tribute," whichever Kirkwood brother singing lead vocals seems to have either swallowed a handful of open safety pins or had his throat caved in with a baseball bat. Not an auspicious start by any stretch.
2. "In Bloom" (Butch Walker & The Black Widows) -- C-
Again, not only not great, but not even pretty good. The chorus is sunnier and sounds like it was performed by a netherworld Beatles.
3. "Come As You Are" (Midnight Juggernauts) -- F
To borrow a phrase from The Best Show's Tom Scharpling, this tuneless "bedroom techno" take on "Come As You Are" is a "five star flop." Monotonous garbage.
4. "Breed" (Titus Andronicus) -- A
Here we go! Visceral, loud, and dirty! It stays true to the spirit of the original song by mostly sounding exactly like the original song. Newermind's first highlight...hopefully not its last.
5. "Lithium" (The Vaselines) -- C-
When Kurt Cobain covered a Vaselines song, the results were some of my favorite Nirvana tunes. Unfortunately, the Vaselines fail to return the favor. This is "Lithium" as a boring funeral dirge. Nothing interesting.
6. "Polly" (Amanda Palmer) -- B+
Eerily schizophrenic and beautifully creepy, Palmer's cover of this song about the kidnapping, rape, and murder of a 14-year-old concert goer sounds like it was recorded in a broken music box full of rusty chains, shattered glass, and ghostly banjos.
7. "Territorial Pissings" (Surfer Blood) -- B
Solid, fairly straightforward take by a band I actually listen to regularly. The song isn't the same without Cobain's signature yelp, but the Surfer Blood boys do an admirable job.
8. "Drain You" (Foxy Shazam) -- F
Nirvana as musical theater--shitty, shitty musical theater. I'm still uncertain whether or not this is a joke. If so, good one???
9. "Lounge Act" (Jessica Lea Mayfield) -- B
Country-tinged take I'd expect to hear on the main stage at a small town apple festival or inside a used bookstore/coffee shop/apple buttery located in the same aforementioned small town.
10. "Stay Away" (Charles Bradley & The Menahan Street Band) -- A
Amazingly funky cover that, surprisingly, really works! Totally belongs on a 70's blaxploitation soundtrack. I could see Shaft punching Whitey in the face while this plays or, like, Coffy kicking some drug dealing jive turkey in his balls.
11. "On A Plain" (Telekinesis) -- C
I used to fantasize that if I was ever in a moderately successful band and we were asked to participate in a Nirvana tribute album, we would cover "On A Plain." Telekinesis' cover is a straightforward adaptation--which I appreciate--but after "Stay Away," it sounds kinda boring and obvious.
12. "Something in the Way" (JEFF the Brotherhood) -- C
Again, straightforward and fine, but uninspired. Everything after that electric cover of "Stay Away" just seems inessential.
13. "Endless Nameless" (EMA) -- C
A hidden track, I guess? I'm embarrassed to say I never stuck around long enough after "Something in the Way" to hear it. It probably sounds about the same as the Nirvana-version, and thankfully, unlike the title suggests, there is an end. "Endless Nameless" is nothing more than garbled screams, whining feedback, and crunchy bass, but it's still a million times better than Midnight Juggernauts' "Come As You Are," which, if I haven't made clear yet, is pure shit.
In summation, I'm glad this was free.
