You're not imagining things. Marmaduke just prevented two young children from being abducted and possibly raped and murdered. Nothing says Happy Mother's Day like a colorful comic strip depiction of attempted kidnapping. Sheesh!
Don't get me wrong: I'm not pro-kidnapping. Far from it, in fact. But was this really the best idea Brad Anderson had this week? Panel #5 is one of the most disturbing things I've seen on the Sunday funny pages, and I regularly read Lio. The creepy perv in his oversized jacket and olive-green hunting cap with Marmaduke's child pal's wrists gripped firmly in his gnarled, adult fists...makes me feel nauseous, something I don't want to experience when I'm enjoying a Mother's Day brunch with my family. And, yet, here it was, badly drawn and creepy as balls. Kinda made me long for the days when Marmaduke was being visited by tiny green extraterrestrials. At least those strips didn't put the image of child sexual exploitation in my head. Boo, Brad Anderson. Boo!
Jump Start, while not nearly as graphic, matched Marmaduke's rampant stupidity this morning with this little adventure:
Is Joe's telephone adventure supposed to be shedding light on a hot button political issue? Is this Robb Armstrong's attempt to satirize the immigration debate currently raging in the United States? Or is this just the stupidest comic strip ever?
I've thought it over and can only assume that this Sunday's Jump Start is, without a doubt, the stupidest strip ever. Congrats, Joe and Marcy!
First of all, Joe, you lazy dick, you can reach that remote. So, the twins wake up. Big deal! They'll fall asleep again.
Secondly, no one speaks that wacky Avatar language, besides maybe a handful of young mouthbreathing men who were too young to get into Star Trek and therefore are ignorant to the whole Klingon language bullshit certain nerds enjoy. Why would a bank offer a Avatar-language option? That's ri-fucking-diculous!
And, OK, let's say there are Na'vi living among us--working for the cable company, enjoying a Starbucks now and again, waiting tables at Outback Steakhouse--and they need to do some over-the-phone banking, so they call Tele-Banking (Is this the name of a bank, Jump Start?) and they get this message and they hear the phrase "For that weird language in Avatar press 3." How the hell do you think that makes them feel? That "weird language?" The message doesn't say, "For that weird language Mexicans speak," does it? Uncouth, Tele-Banking!
